I lost it yesterday. What's the use anyway? All the encouragement and all the 'good words' about who God is I had lent to others in their times of trouble seemed to fall flat when applied to my own anguish. "Where was God and why was HE letting this situation continue?" and "Why wasn't he doing what he said he could do?!" were questions rumbling around in my head. And "WHO KNOWS!" seemed to be the only answer. My once firm footing based on God's promises seemed to be crumbling beneath my feet and I could feel myself stumbling.
One verse seemed to scream out in my soul as I prayed was from Psalm 27. "I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living." It was more like-- I DEMAND TO SEE THE GOODNESS IN THE LAND OF THE LIVING!!! NOW!!! But this 'goodness' had not made itself visible in this situation. Turmoil and heartache were in its place taking all my attention. It wasn't until this morning when I took time to actually look at the verse in context with rest of the Psalm that my wobbly legs began to find their balance again.
"The LORD is my light and my salvation--whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life--of whom shall I be afraid?" are the opening words to this passage. The word 'stronghold' means defense or strength. Defense itself means to take action against attack or challenge while strength has the idea of endurance and impenetrable structure. Together we get the picture of a God who as the "stronghold of [our] lives" has what it takes to keep the enemy at bay. My part in all this? Nothing at all.
You see, it says in verse 1, "The LORD is my light and my salvation..." Not can be. Not will be if I just ___________. Its says he IS. "When the wicked advance against me to devour me, it is my enemies and my foes who will stumble and fall. Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then I will be confident." [3-4] Why such confidence? Because he IS my light and my salvation. I can trust it.
The rest of the Psalm repeats the idea of the Lord's protection by keeping us safe in his dwelling, hiding us in his sacred tent and setting us high upon a rock out of harm's way until we have dominion over the enemies that surround us.
The Psalm does point out that since the Lord IS our salvation and that we can be confident in that fact when trouble comes our heart can say as the writer's, "Seek your [God's] face." We don't have look at the situation. We can look to God and ask to be taught and to be led as we move through it.
I don't know how the current situation in my life will play out but I do know that however the Lord has decided to work it out "I [will] remain confident of this: I will see the goodness in the land of the living."